ON THE COVER Staff Photo Nick Brothers
Jude (left) and Jeff Castellano sit together on a park bench on the University of Arkansas grounds. As Jeff transitions from female to male, it has had no effect on their marriage.
Jeffery Augustine Castellano is just a normal guy, trying to exist, exist in peace.
As life-changing as transitioning from female to male is, to Castellano it’s merely something that needed to be done.
“I have my Tranniversary every year,” Castellano laughs, “June 12, 2014, is the day I officially acknowledged it as a thing.”
That was a year ago, and Jeff has been in transition since. In the eyes of the public right now, we have transwomen like Caitlyn Jenner and Laverne Cox, the former of whom has transitioned very publicly. As far as transmen go, Chaz Bono is really the only man with a standing or presence. Exposure for trans-individuals is better than it’s ever been, but it’s still not what it needs to be. To Jeff, it’s important that folks know their stories are not reflective of every trans-person.
For him, the gender binary didn’t make much sense from a young age. Folks called him a tomboy growing up, due to the kinds of clothes he wore, and doing activities typically considered “boy things.” It wasn’t until he lived with a man who was in the midst of transitioning himself that something clicked.
“I could not have come to this realization without a catalyst, and he was that catalyst,” Jeff said. “He talked through this stuff with me. He forwarded the first postulation, I guess, and made me not feel like a total weirdo, because like, he told me things that he felt pre-transition for him that I had (felt, and) not told a single living person, because it made me feel like such a weirdo.”
The puzzle piece snapped in place. After attending a public forum where he declared his gender identity to the world, Jeff started down a real road that he had unknowingly been on his entire life.
“I got lucky,” Jeff said, about starting hormone replacement: “I got really lucky. I am a member of several masculine support groups, and with the average wait being a few months to a few years; the latter being the typical. I actually knew my therapist through several of my friends up here, and I got in to see her in January 2015.
Staff Photo Nick Brothers
Jeff Castellano is transitioning from female to male. One of the biggest issues he faces right now is the inconsistency of his driver’s license photo ID listing his former name and gender. This has led to numerous inconveniences, such as applying for an apartment lease to Facebook denying him a name change.
“She was like, ‘Yeah, you’re the last person to figure this out, I’m going to recommend you for hormone replacement therapy, and this will drastically improve your quality of life.’”
Even with Jeff’s luck in finding a fairly easy path to transition, he’s still doing it in the South, in a time when Fayetteville has been polarized over LGBT civil rights issues.
When Ordinance 119 came about, which would have provided housing and employment protections for LGBT had it not been repealed by public vote in December 2014, Jeff was one of the many people who got up to speak at the podium the City Council meeting that ran until 3 a.m. Hundreds of people filled City Hall and even more were watching the live stream. Consequently, Jeff started to be recognized and thanked by random people on the street following the City Council’s decision to pass the ordinance.
“That kind of visibility is a double-edged sword,” he said.
With more of a public profile, Jeff and his husband Jude were wary of attackers.
“It was three in the morning! I thought we were going to get stabbed,” said Jude Castellano, Jeff’s husband, laughing. Slightly.
They weren’t stabbed, but violence is a very real and very sad fear that too many people have. When it comes to the ordinance, though, Jeff and Jude have been more directly affected by the lack of protections in place for LGBT people.
While many corporations already have policies in place to protect individuals on the basis of sexuality and gender identity, smaller businesses — such as local property managers — aren’t beholden to that and people can and have lost their homes because their landlord disagreed with their “lifestyle choice.”
Jeff and Jude are, unfortunately, are two of the latest people to have this happen. In their apartment, they had a rainbow flag and a trans-flag hanging in the window. They were hung among their neighbors with window hangings, ranging from sports teams to Iraqi flags. Their apartments went through a management change during their lease. With the change from the familiar and the friendly, as their old manager was welcoming, they decided to let their lease run its course.
“Yes, we are leaving,” Jeff told the new manager when she asked.
“Good, I didn’t want to have to evict you,” was her reply, Jeff said.
When asked to comment, the manager for Foxborough insisted it wasn’t any issue over the window hangings; rather, Jeff and Jude had draped the flag over their balcony, which the lease prohibits. However, Jeff said the only time they draped a flag was for roughly two hours following the Supreme Court’s marriage decision, which coincided with the day they were moving out.
Finding a new place to lay their bones has been an issue in the time since, which has seen them surfing between friends and taking kindness when and where they can.
“It’s hard when someone sees you and your driver’s license is wrong,” Jeff said. “They either think fraud or start treating you weird.”
Thus, housing is one of many basic things that Jeff has difficulty trying for. His license still lists him by his original name and gender, which doesn’t match his face and the man who is presenting the ID.
Surgeries to make his outside match his inside are a costly level to reach. Without insurance, mastectomies (surgery to remove breast tissue) can cost anywhere from $15,000 to $55,000 or more. That’s presuming insurance covers that kind of surgery — which, even when talking about breast cancer is still considered elective by many providers.
So it goes.
Staff Photo Nick Brothers
Jeff Castellano wears his St. Augustine necklace. After learning about the life of St. Augustine, he found faith in Old Catholicism and is an active member of St. Michael The Archangel in Fayetteville. The church makes it a point to be accepting of all walks of life.
People today tend to think of transmen and transwomen as people who are confused. They don’t see them as the men and women they are, they see them as someone sick that the world is giving an excuse for. Never mind that science has already given ample evidence that being trans is a real, biological thing. Never mind the possibility of X and Y chromosome confusion in utero. Never mind the lengthy and colorful history of transmen and transwomen in society dating back to the dawn of civilization.
The overall point, as I said at the very beginning, is that Jeff is just a normal guy. He loves his husband Jude, who loves him just as much. Jeff and his husband were married man and woman, and Jude is supportive of Jeff’s transition.
“It makes me feel better to see him feel better,” Jude said. “That’s good enough for me.”
Jeff worries about growing his mutton chops and wearing clothes that look right. These are very simple things that anyone can understand — the need to be you. There’s nothing nefarious, this isn’t some ’80s movie trope — this is real life to Jeff and the estimated 700,000 transgender people out there gutsy enough to change their lives to suit their needs. Because that’s what it is. It’s a need. It’s not a fantasy or some confusing thing, it’s their real, actual self.
“We don’t want anything other than to fit in,” Jeff said. “We don’t want anything special.”
On a more personal note: Jeff doesn’t have the money of the Jenner clan, nor do most trans individuals on the planet, so he’s asking for help from the masses. Now, I have seen the Internet galvanize behind pointless causes too many times to count. This is something that matters. If everyone that reads this gave just $5, imagine what that could do for Jeff. So help change his life a little; do something good and decent for the world. Because Jeff deserves to be Jeff as much as you deserve to be you.
