Not the Marrying Type, Part 1

Not the Marrying Type, Part 1
Rachel Birdsell

Rachel Birdsell

The other day my daughter sent me a link to an article from the website I wasn’t familiar with the website, but learned that it is the site of Stephen Kim, who is the pastor of Mustard Seed Church in New York City. The article was titled, “10 Women Christian Men Should Not Marry.” I’ve read a lot of crazy shit in my life, so I know I shouldn’t have been shocked by what I read, but I was, and I’m still a little shocked that someone could be this batpoo nutso. I can’t fit all ten women into one article, so I’ll give you five this week, and the remaining five next week. So, let’s dive into this pool of crazy.

1. The Unbeliever – On the surface, it may seem like one’s religious beliefs would be an important factor in deciding whether or not two people are compatible, so maybe Stephen isn’t being absurd about this one. But if you dig down a little deeper, the core values, rather than whether one follows God, Buddha, or no one, are what determine compatibility, therefore Stephen is definitely still asinine.

2. The Divorcee – Don’t get too bent out of shape, Christian dudes, because there’s an exception to this one, and that is that you can marry a woman if her marriage ended because of adultery. I guess those women who got a divorce because their husbands were beating them every night are SOL.

3. The Older Woman – Stephen points out that while it isn’t a sin, it’s not exactly what God wants for his menfolk. That’s because men are supposed to be the head of the household, and a younger dude can’t boss around an older woman as well as he can a younger one.

4. The Feminist – Yes, the dreaded F word. Even more dreaded in some circles than that other F word. Stephen tells us that there isn’t room in Christendom for any “Christian feminist.” I don’t know what all of you Christian women who are feminists are supposed to do, but there’s no room for you. I guess you’ll have to convert. Maybe the Buddhist flock has some openings for feminists. If not, I guarantee the pagans will take you.

5. The Sexy-Dresser – Steve-o reminds men that they want godly, not gaudy, women. Oh, that clever, clever Stephen, with his joking and such. He reminds us that women who wear revealing clothes are only doing it to catch a certain type of man. I’m not sure what type of man that is. I’m guessing a straight one with his hormones intact. I’m also not sure why Stephen doesn’t think that women can dress however they want for no other reason than it’s how they like to dress.

So, there are the first five in this lineup of the barmiest bunch of bunk I’ve seen in awhile. Thankfully, not all Christians are as batty as Stephen is. On the other hand, even one person who feels this way about women is too many. Stay tuned next week as I reveal why Christian men shouldn’t marry women with frequent flyer miles, and I don’t mean the dirty kind.

Rachel Birdsell is a freelance writer and graphic artist. You can reach her at

Categories: Commentary
Tags: Curious Crow