Q. You recently wrote about wearing a suit to a wedding and I am looking for another option. This fall I have 3 weddings coming up, all with overlapping friends, and I don’t want to wear the same to each. It would be a little boring to me. Additionally, I am retired and no longer have a suit that fits me, and I am not particularly connected to 2 of the wedding couples so that formality is not needed, and I have nearly a dozen blazers and sport coats. I may very well buy a suit to be prepared for funerals and more formal settings, but I’d like to wear just a jacket and tie to at least 2 of these. What are some combinations I should consider?

A. As long as the invitation does not state any specific dress preferences, such as “black-tie suggested” or “cocktail attire,” there is no requirement for you to necessarily wear a dressy suit. Even so, there is an expectation that you will dress in good taste, keeping everything you wear classy, and avoiding anything that is too casual. This boils down to a pair of lists, Do’s and Don’ts.

DO’s:

• Since you already own so many blazers and sport coats, you will see that some of them look dressier and are more elegant than others. Solid-color blazers are dressier than tweed sport coats. That will help you select from among your possible choices. Select one or two blazers that fit you best, that are made of better quality fabric, that are most suitable to the wedding’s location and season, and that your mirror tells look good on you. If you have both single- and double-breasted blazers, the double-breasted is likely to be dressier. That does not mean you must choose it, but it might help you decide.
• Choose a  pair of dress trousers (preferably not too light in color) that go particularly well with your blazer, and make sure they are the right length (so they hang with a small “break”).
• Select a fine-quality dressy shirt (ideally all-cotton with a point collar and French cuffs) that will help dress “up” your blazer.  
• Look for a few accessories that complement your combination nicely. Among the dressy options  you have are the best-looking neckties in your closet, beautiful cuff links, a fine not-too-sporty watch,  perfectly-buffed leather shoes (lace-ups or loafers), an alligator belt, a neatly-placed silk or linen pocket square, and, for something unique, perhaps a smartly-contrasting  vest.  Remember, the tie is a man’s most noticeable and memorable accessory. Pick a different one to wear to each wedding.

DON’Ts:

• No matter what you may see in fashion magazines and advertisement photographs, be sure you do not choose items that are exactly matched in color and pattern, making a “set.” This is something that people selling clothes are trying to pitch. Most of these come in the form of tie-and-pocket-square sets in identical fabrics – not a grown-up, sophisticated look.  Fabrics for a well-dressed man’s accessories are supposed to be color and pattern coordinated, not exactly matched. 
• Please do not include a boutonniere as one of your accessories – neither a real flower nor faux.  As you are not part of the wedding party, it is not appropriate.  
• Items that are too casual. Do not think a blazer allows for a polo underneath or a tie allows you to wear chinos. Anything resembling chinos, jeans, short sleeves, boat shoes, or sneakers are wrong.      

Men often ask for specific combinations which are hard to suggest without knowing your size, coloring, preferences, and/or items in your closet. As I outlined above, perhaps a fine blue blazer (double- or single-breasted) with good dark gray or taupe trousers, a white French-cuffed, point- collar shirt, and a quality geometric-patterned tie repeating the blue of the jacket would be a fine choice for one combination. You could swap out just the tie and trousers for another, and choose another solid blazer (maybe in black) being sure to coordinate the tie with that as well. 

When deciding what to wear to a wedding, you have a chance to express your personal style and your good judgement while at the same time respecting the occasion and the wedding couple.

Please send your men’s dress and grooming questions to MALE CALL: Lois.Fenton@prodigy.net