Stoned

Stoned

The Best Vistas For Altered Perceptions

(hypothetically speaking)

Disclaimer: The Free Weekly does not encourage its readers to violate the laws of the land, including smoking, snorting or otherwise ingesting restricted substances. Also, the Freekly thinks you’re stupid if you do get high in any fashion and then choose to drive.

That said, should you find yourself in an altered state of mind and you’re looking for a pleasant vista to accompany the sensation, here are the 15 must-experience vistas — taken to by a designated driver — in Northwest Arkansas.

In addition, none of the places on the list have condoned or approved of this activity. If you do happen to visit these locales, don’t be a jerk. Behave yourself.

If you act up or cause trouble, we will laugh at you and run your mugshot from the whatever detention facility you get tossed in.

By Susannah Patton

TFW Contributing Writer

1. The Botanical Gardens of the Ozarks

4703 N. Crossover Road, Fayetteville

This green oasis of plants, flowers and butterflies is an enchanting way to spend an afternoon and becomes even more so when the senses are heightened.

2. Evergreen Cemetery

William Street, Fayetteville

Evergreen Cemetery has more than 3,000 graves dating back to the 1840s. Some very famous Arkansans are buried here, including Sen. J. William Fulbright, Gov. Archibald Yell, Lafayette Gregg and educator Sophia Sawyer. If you enjoy watching the History Channel after toking, you’ll love this real-life walk through Fayetteville’s past. Evergreen is especially beautiful in the spring and fall.

3. Monte Ne Inn Chicken

13843 E. Arkansas 94

Rogers, AR 72758

There’s no better cure for a case of the munchies than the family-style menu at this iconic fried chicken joint. It’s all you can eat fried chicken, bean soup, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, cole slaw, homemade rolls and apple butter.

Closed Mondays and the month of January.

4. Fast Lane Entertainment

N. Dixieland Road, Lowell

If you’re looking to get off your couch and enjoy some kid-like fun, Fast Lane is the place. You can bowl, play laser tag, ride go-karts or spend a week’s worth of pay in the arcade trying to win enough tickets to buy a plastic water gun, some jelly bracelets and a fist full of Jolly Ranchers. And there’s beer. Need I say more?

5. Starlight Skatium

612 N. College Ave., Fayetteville

Another way to act like a kid for a day: strap on some roller-skates and cruise around the rink to some awesome pop music. This also provides some serious entertaining people watching, especially if you like watching people fall.

Or for some real heart-pounding entertainment, check out the rink when they have a Roller Derby match going on. You won’t be disappointed.

6. Tilly Willy Bridge

S. Wilson Hollow Road, Fayetteville

There’s nothing like a creepy ghost encounter to make a dull Friday night more interesting. According to legend, a woman crashed her car off the Tilly Willy bridge in the 1970s, killing herself and her children. People claim they’ve seen the woman dancing in the fields near the bridge.

There are also tales of a ghost car that drives across the bridge before disappearing around the bend. Even if you don’t get a scare, the bridge is a cool spot to sit and listen to the music of frogs and cicadas.

7. Fayetteville Farmer’s Market

Fayetteville Square

There’s lots of entertaining people and dog watching here, and usually there’s some pretty good music. Get a coffee and a danish and watch people try to maneuver around the dogs.

8. War Eagle Mill

110 War Eagle Road, Rogers

See an authentic water-powered gristmill in operation, walk along the historic War Eagle Bridge or have lunch in the Bean Palace Restaurant, a perfect Arkansas day. One caveat: The historic bridge is currently being renovated, so you’ll likely have to wait on strolling across it.

9. Gator Golf

2692 N. College Ave., Fayetteville

There’s something very nostalgic and retro about Gator Golf — maybe because it’s been a Fayetteville attraction for so long. But something beckons us to this miniature golf course on Saturday afternoons. It’s a great place to feel young and silly again.

10. Mount Sequoyah

Fayetteville

The top of Mount Sequoyah has always been a choice parking spot. It offers full views of downtown Fayetteville and the University of Arkansas campus, plus a huge, glowing cross. What more could one ask for?

11. Devil’s Den State Park

West Fork

A picturesque place to wander, explore and become one with the outdoors. Rent one of the 17 cabins for the weekend, and let the nature inspire you.

12. Winslow, Ark.

This town is too cute to miss — a true Ozark oasis. Just drive down there and see where the road takes you.

13. 112 Drive-In

3352 N. Arkansas 112, Fayetteville

Feel like you’ve gone back in time by backing your car into one of the spots at the drive-in and watching a movie under the stars. For an even better thrill, wait until the drive-in is showing a horror film.

14. Eureka Springs, Ark.

A drive through the winding, mountain-side streets of Eureka Springs is one of the best ways to spend a blazed afternoon. Get lost in the Victorian village, peruse the local shops or have a beer at one of the many pubs or cafes.

15. Wild Wilderness Drive-Through Safari

20923 Safari Road, Gentry

A 400-acre safari, with a four-mile drive through, petting parks and walk-through areas.

There is nothing quite as mind-boggling as seeing lions, tigers and a hippopotamus roaming through the Arkansas landscape. The thrill of having an emu chase your car through the park can only be topped by seeing monkeys swing from your antennae. You can get out of the car and visit the pens of porcupines, exotic birds and zebras. But animal lovers be warned: the sight of these animals so far from their natural habitat, although undoubtedly well-cared for, might be disturbing.

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